Creating Rapport that Leads to More.pdf

CREATING RAPPORT THAT

LEADS TO MORE

By Kara Oh

What Is Rapport?

First, let’s demystify rapport. You know that moment when you realize you’re in love ? I

hope you’ve had a moment like that. You’re in a romantic restaurant, or sitting in front of

a glowing fireplace, candlelight illuminates your faces… you’re both saying the right

things. You can’t stop looking at each other. You’re breathing in unison – your bodies are

moving in sync. You finish each other’s sentences – you begin to know what the other is

thinking. You’re so in love. You feel the rapport. Ahh...we all long for moments like that.

Here’s a definition of rapport: Rapport is a connection with another person at a

fundamental level. We experience connection because we see and experience their

similarities , their affinity. The differences are not important at that moment; it’s as if

we’ve made a new friend quickly. Rapport is feeling great when you’re with someone.

Rapport is a sense of knowing and being known . Rapport is being in sync with another at

a spiritual, or soul level.

This short ebook will teach you how to create that feeling more of the time and not just

with potential lovers.

Wanting to create rapport will cause you to look for that spark , that life force, that human

connection with other people. The best way of doing it is to just look in their eyes. You’ll

feel that connection immediately if you’re looking for it. But this is not just about eye

contact, this is about heart contact and soul contact… a much deeper connection.

Whether it goes further depends on what you want, what they want and what you can

create together. The best part is that you won’t know what’s possible until you take the

risk and attempt to create rapport.

What Are The Benefits Of Rapport?

I want to make a distinction before we go any further. There are two kinds of rapport.

One is Radiant Rapport and the other is Resonant Rapport.

Radiant Rapport can be created instantly by flirting with people. Teasing the checkout

lady at the market, smiling at old people, playing with a child. The energy behind it

comes from your natural state of happiness. You are, in a way, radiating love and people

are very hungry for love. My ex-husband used to say I sprinkle fairy dust everywhere I

go. It happens almost by accident. This is a great way to be because any amount of joy

you can spread will not only uplift you, but everyone with whom you come in contact.

Creating Rapport That Leads To More

When you interact with everyone with Radiant Rapport, they will be happy to see you

and interact with you because they can count on you to uplift their spirits. You’ll get

better service at the restaurants you frequent, at your dry cleaner, with your gardener, etc.

And you will make them feel more important because you treat them with care and

respect.

Resonant Rapport is imbued with a deeper intention. It’s purposeful and filled with a

desire to build a relationship with someone, unlike Radiant Rapport, which is more

transitory. You create Resonant Rapport by consciously connecting your heart to theirs.

The first step in building this kind of rapport is to imagine the energy that emanates from

your heart is literally going into their heart. When you do this the energy that permeates

your time together is saturated with love. Depending on the kind of relationship you

desire to build: friendship, long-term business, family, romantic or purely sexual, you

will adjust the kind of love you send out.

But always, with both kinds of rapport, there must be an element of respect and caring.

Otherwise it is not rapport but manipulation. People see through manipulation, if not

immediately, very soon. And when they discover you have not been sincere, they will be

hurt or angry. The goal of true rapport is to lift people up with each and every interaction.

You literally have unlimited possibilities when you know how to create both Radiant and

Resonant Rapport.

Here are some of the benefits:

• Greater connection

• More popularity

• Instant community

• More exciting social life

• Reduced jealousy

• Better service

• Increased team spirit

• Increased self-esteem

• More business

• Higher income

• Enhanced feeling of love

• Connection with spirit

• Increased health and vitality

• Life will be a greater sense of adventure

• Stronger feelings of contribution

• People wanting to contribute to you

• Have more fun

People who have the ability to create rapport with everyone have lives that look magical,

and full of wonder, with happy coincidences and synchronicity. They become energy

Creating Rapport That Leads To More

magnets, attracting people and all manner of wonderful things to them – love, friendship,

prosperity, fun, excitement, money, sales, and good health.

In his book Unlimited Power, Anthony Robbins puts it this way: “The ability to establish

rapport is one of the most important skills a person can have. To be a good performer or a

good salesman, a good parent or a good friend, a good persuader or a good politician,

what you really need is rapport, the ability to form a powerful common human bond and

a relationship of responsiveness.

“Rapport with others makes almost any task simpler, easier, and more enjoyable. No

matter what you want to do, see, create, share, or experience in life, whether it’s

achieving spiritual realization or earning a million dollars, there’s someone else who can

help you accomplish your goal more quickly and easily. Someone else who knows how

to get there quicker or more effectively or can do something to help you get where you

want to go more rapidly. The way to enlist that person is to achieve rapport, the magic

bond that unites people and makes them feel like partners.”

It’s About Being Honest

There are those who say that rapport skills are manipulative. I don’t agree. Since rapport

is about true, sincere and heartfelt connection, how could that be manipulative? How can

it ever be dishonest when the goal is to truly connect with another, to experience their

humanity, to see their sameness? It’s actually the noblest of pursuits.

In any interaction, you bring the energy down, neutralize it, or bring it up. Authentic

rapport always brings it up – it adds to the energy of the other and takes that energy out

into the world.

People have their “strategies” for winning people over but that isn’t rapport. When it’s

insincere, it doesn’t create true rapport. If you don’t care for people, if you’re just using

people, you’ll never be able to create rapport. When you’re doing it just to get something,

it’s dishonest, and that gets in the way. Your intentions need to be honorable, clean, and

high-minded. It’s about creating a true connection, not just about getting something.

It Won’t Work If You Try Too Hard

If you try too hard to create rapport with others, chances are, you won’t create rapport at

all. It’s always off-putting to them.

Why do we try so hard? Because we want to impress, we feel others have more power

than we do, we’re insecure or it’s too important to us.

If people don’t want to create rapport with us, we need to back off a bit, go back to the

basics, not work at it so hard or simply create rapport with someone who wants to.

Creating Rapport That Leads To More

Develop the Habit Of Rapport

In this process of learning rapport, you need to embrace the idea that true rapport isn’t

something you turn on and off. It must become a part of who you are, an habitual

behavior that you do unconsciously, just like breathing.

If you are to have the kind of life you want, with friends who you care about, a lover who

enhances your life and respect from the people you work with, you will want to become a

master at continual, authentic rapport. It isn’t just a good idea – it is a must for any kind

of success. Please believe you have the resources to do so.

You have the capacity to be a person who creates rapport everywhere you go, to become

a master at rapport… with everyone you meet. When creating rapport is such a natural

part of who you are, you will notice opportunities coming your way that would never

have shown up before.

Everything Starts With Rapport

Every relationship starts with rapport. Actually, the quality of your relationships depends

on it. Total satisfaction and deep connection can’t occur without rapport. Nothing

significant happens without it.

If you have had difficulty creating heart-warming friendships and fulfilling romantic

relationships, it’s because you have not learned the art of rapport.

No man is an island. We are all interdependent and we cannot accomplish much of what

we want in life without the cooperation of others. And without the ability to create

rapport we cannot create the deep connection required to develop relationships –

romantic and otherwise – that give meaning and depth to our lives.

With rapport you can create the quality of life you’ve always wanted.

Rapport Can Change Your Life

I learned the art of creating rapport by accident. When I was young I was painfully

insecure, which caused me to feel disconnected from everyone around me. I was envious

of my friends who could hug each other and be so natural when they interacted. I was so

in need of learning to create rapport that people thought I was a snob and aloof. Little did

they know that I was simply afraid. So I decided to make a change.

First, I thought about the two women I knew who were great with people. I was going to

a big Christmas party and decided I’d bring the feeling of “enjoyment of other people”

into my being so I could go to the party and practice. So, before I left for the party, I sat

quietly, closed my eyes, and imagined these two women standing on either side of me. I

imagined what it would feel like to have their ability to connect with people, then

Creating Rapport That Leads To More

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